Traveling with preteens and teens is a breeze in comparison to traveling with little ones but as a parent you still want to sit near your kiddos in case they need you for anything. If you've traveled on an airline in the last several years, you know it's much cheaper to chose the basic seats in the main cabin. There's nothing different about these particular seats other than the airline sort of randomly selects your seat and if you're traveling alone, that's really not a bad deal. The risk gets to be a little higher if you're traveling with a party that you'd like to keep together - like your children. One mom took the risk and banked on a stranger accommodating...that's not quite how it played out.People sit in the wrong seats on planes all the time, usually because they read their ticket wrong or accidentally sit one row ahead. Takes no time to double check your ticket and move along, but when Tammy Nelson did a double take at her ticket after seeing the mom in her window seat, she realized she wasn't mistakenly staring at the wrong row.This mom boarded the plane with her older children and had taken it upon herself to sit in the same row as her children, essentially commandeering a stranger's seat. Nelson assumed it was a mistake and informed the woman that the seat was in fact hers but the response she received was surprising."She said, 'Oh, you want to sit here?'," Nelson tells Good Morning America. "She said, 'Oh, well I just thought I could switch with you because these are my kids.'" That's an interesting assumption when seats are assigned and many people, like Nelson, pay extra to have the seat they prefer. Now, there's no telling if funds were tight and this was an unplanned trip for the mom and kids which caused her to buy the more budget friendly tickets or if she was simply being frugal and was banking on the kindness of a stranger. Either way, Nelson specifically paid for a window seat due to motion sickness and though she paid extra, she was willing to sit in the other row if that seat was also a window seat. But it turns out, it was a middle seat. Surely there's someone out there that loves the middle seat. Maybe a cold natured person that enjoys the body heat of two strangers sitting uncomfortably close. Or perhaps someone that doesn't mind accidentally sleeping on an unsuspecting passenger's shoulder. But that person isn't Nelson, so when the middle seat was offered in exchange for her bought and paid for window seat, she politely but sternly declined. @myconquering Having had only 90 minutes of sleep the night before and knowing I had to give a presentation to 500 people, I desperately needed some sleep, so I did not agree to switch seats. ?‍♀️ Before anyone comes after me… the kids looked like they were about 11 and 15 years old. And the mom was in arms-reach of both of them from the middle seat in the row behind us. The mom proceeded to complain for at least 15 minutes to the person next to her loud enough for me to hear. But the woman actually defended me – several times. It was so kind and I appreciated it so much because I was feeling really guilty. ?‍♀️ ##airplaneseat##seatswitching##airplanekarens Her refusal to give in to the mom's seemingly entitled request for Nelson's seat has resulted in parents and child-fee people cheering her on after she posted the details on her TikTok page, MyCONQUERing. The video has over 3.4 million views. "Nope. If it's not an upgrade it's a sacrifice," a commenter writes."You did the RIGHT thing. Folks need to plan their travel together. Lack of planning on their part does not constitute an inconvenience on yours," one person says. "I have 3 kids and have sat in different rows when they were passed toddler age. I agree, book your flight earlier," another writes. "You were right. As a woman with 3 children, I always pay extra so we're sat together," another mom says.Nelson is also a mom so she knows how important it is to sit next to kids on flights. But since airlines have made that a luxury, as the parent, you have to plan to pay extra or accept that you likely won't be seated next to your children. Hopefully in the future, this unnamed mom is seated next to her children or pays extra to make sure it happens. In the meantime, people continue to support Nelson standing her ground. This article originally appeared last year.

Nothing can ever fully prepare you for being an adult. Once you leave childhood behind, the responsibilities, let-downs and setbacks come at you fast. It’s tiring and expensive, and there's no easy-to-follow roadmap for happiness and success. A Reddit user asked the online forum, “What’s an adult problem nobody prepared you for?” and there were a lot of profound answers that get to the heart of the disappointing side of being an adult.One theme that ran through many responses is the feeling of being set adrift. When you’re a kid, the world is laid out as a series of accomplishments. You learn to walk, you figure out how to use the bathroom, you start school, you finish school, maybe you go to college, and so on.However, once we’re out of the school system and out from under our parents’ roofs, there is a vast, complicated world out there and it takes a long time to learn how it works. The tough thing is that if you don’t get a good head start, you can spend the rest of your life playing catch-up.Then, you hit middle age and realize that life is short and time is only moving faster.Adulthood also blindsides a lot of people because we realize that many adults are simply children who grew older. The adult world is a lot more like high school than a teenager could ever imagine.The Reddit thread may seem a bit depressing at first, but there are a lot of great lessons that younger people can take to heart. The posts will also make older people feel a lot better because they can totally relate.Being an adult is hard, exhausting and expensive. But we’re all in this together and by sharing the lessons we’ve learned we can help lighten each other's load just a bit.Here are 21 of the most powerful responses to the question: “What is an adult problem nobody prepared you for?”1. Lack of purpose"Lack of purpose. All your young life you are given purpose of passing exams and learning, then all of a sudden you are thrown into the world and told to find your own meaning," — Captain_Snow.2. No bed time"You can stay up as late as you want. But you shouldn't," — geek-fit3. Friendships"Where did all my friends go?" — I_Love_Small_Breasts Most of them are at the same place as you are ... Probably wondering the same thing," — Blackdraon0034. Bodily changes"I'm closer to fifty than forty, would have been nice to be better prepared for some of the ways your body starts to change at this point that don't normally get talked about. For instance your teeth will start to shift from general aging of your gums," — dayburner.5. People don't change"Didnt know that other adults have the emotional intelligence of teenagers and its almost impossible to deal with logically," — Super-Progress-63866. Money"$5K is a lot to owe, but not a lot to have," — Upper-Job51307. Our parents age, too"Handling the decline and death of your parents," - Agave6668. Free time"Not having a lot of free-time or time by myself," — detective_kiara9. No goals"Not having a pre-defined goal once I was out of college. Growing up my goals were set for me: get through elementary school! then middle school! Then high school, and get into college and get a degree, then get a job, and then...? Vague "advance in your career, buy a house, find a spouse, have a kid or multiple, then retire." At 22 I had no idea how to break that down more granularly," — FreehandBirdlime10. Constant upkeep"Life is all about maintenance. Your body, your house, your relationships, everything requires constant never ending maintenance," — IHateEditedBGMusic11. Exhaustion"Being able to do so many things because I'm an adult but too tired to do any of them," — London8212. Loneliness"Being an adult feels extremely lonely," — Bluebloop013. Dinner"Having to make dinner every. Fucking. Day," — EndlesslyUnfinished14. Time changes"The more life you’ve lived, the faster time seems to go," — FadedQuill15. You're responsibile, even if you didn't mean it"You are held to account for bad behaviour for which you are negligent even if you had no intention to cause harm. As a lawyer, I see this all the time. People don't think they're responsible for mistakes. You are," — grishamlaw16. Work is like high school"The intricacies of workplace politics," — Steve_Lobsen writes. ""When you're in school, you think that you won't have to deal with gossiping and bullying once you leave school. Unfortunately, that is not true," — lady_laughs_too_much17. Nowhere to turn"How easy it is to feel stuck in a bad situation (job, relationship, etc) just because the cost and effort of getting out can seem daunting. And sometimes you just have to accept a figurative bowl full of shit because you can't afford to blow up your life," — movieguy9545318. The happiness question"Figuring out what makes you happy. Everyone keeps trying to get you to do things you're good at, or that makes you money, but never to pursue what you enjoy," — eternalwanderer519. Constant cleaning"The kitchen is always dirty. You’ll clean it at least three times every day," — cewnc20. Life costs money"One adult problem nobody prepared me for is how expensive everything is. I always thought that as an adult I would be able to afford the things I wanted, but it turns out that's not always the case! I've had to learn how to budget and save up for the things I want, and it's been a difficult process," — Dull_Dog_812621. Keeping above water"All of it together. I was relatively warned about how high rent is, car bills and repairs, how buying healthy food is expensive as hell but important for your health, how to exercise and save what you can, my parents did their best to fill in my knowledge about taxes and healthcare and insurance that my schooling missed, about driving and cleaning a household, about setting boundaries at work but working hard and getting ahead if you can, about charity and what it means to take care of a pet and others, about being a good partner if you were lucky enough to have one, about how dark and messed up the world is when you just read the news and what all that means to me and my community… I was reasonably warned about all of it."No one could have ever prepared me for how hard doing all of it at the same time and keeping your head above that water would actually be," — ThatNoNameWriterThis article originally appeared two years ago.

Studies show that having daughters makes men more sympathetic to women's issues.And while it would be nice if men did not need a genetic investment in a female person in order to gain this perspective, lately I've had sympathy for those newly woke dads. My two sons have caused something similar to happen to me. I've begun to glimpse the world through the eyes of a young male. And among the things I'm finding here in boyland are the same obnoxious gender norms that rankled when I was a girl.Of course, one notices norms the most when they don't fit. If my tween sons were happily boy-ing away at boy things, neither they nor I would notice that they were hemmed in.But oh boy, are they not doing that. In fact, if I showed you a list of my sons' collective interests and you had to guess their gender, you'd waver a bit, but then choose girl.Baking, reading, drawing, holidays, films, volleyball, cute mammals, video games, babies and toddlers, reading, travel, writing letters.I imagine many of you are thinking at this point: That's awesome that your boys are interested in those things!There's more. One loves comics and graphic novels but gravitates to stories with strong female protagonists, like Ms. Marvel and The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl.Cool! I love it.And sports. They are thoroughly bored by team sports. They don't play them. They won't watch them. They will up- or down-arrow through any number of sporting events on TV to get to a dance contest or to watch competitive baking.So? Nothing wrong with that.Those are the kinds of things all my progressive friends say.But it's often not the message my sons themselves hear from the other adults in their lives, their classmates, and the media.For example, the first get-to-know-you question they are inevitably asked by well-meaning grown-ups is, "So, do you play sports?" When they say, "No, not really," the adult usually continues brightly, "Oh, so what do you like to do, then?"No one explicitly says it's bad for a boy not to play sports. But when it's always the first question asked, the implication is clear: playing sports is normal; therefore, not playing them is not.The truth is that one of them does play a sport. He figure skates, as does my daughter. When people find out that she skates, they beam at her, as if she suddenly has possession of a few rays of Olympic glory. In the days before my son stopped telling people that he ice skates, most of them hesitated and then said, "Oh, so you are planning to play hockey?"But it's not just what people say. It's all those pesky, unwritten rules. When he was in second grade, my younger son liked the Nancy Drew and the Clue Crew series. But he refused to check any out of the school library. He explained: "Girls can read boy books, but boys can't read girl books. Girls can wear boy colors or girl colors, but boys can only wear boy colors. Why is that, Mom?"I didn't have an answer.An obvious starting point — and the one that we have the most control over — is to change the way we speak to the boys in our lives.As Andrew Reiner suggests in a spot-on essay, we should engage boys in analytical, emotion-focused conversations, just like we do with girls. In "How to Talk to Little Girls," Lisa Bloom offers alternatives to the appearance-focused comments so often directed at young girls: asking a girl what she's reading or about current events or what she would like to see changed in the world. I could copy-paste Bloom's list and slap a different title on it: "How to Ask Boys About Something Besides Sports."And with a few more built-in nudges, we might expand the narrow world of boyhood more quickly. Boy Scouts could offer badges for developing skills in child care, teamwork, and journaling. Girl-dominated activities like art, dance, gymnastics, and figure skating could be made more welcoming to boys, with increased outreach and retention efforts. My son could write his own essay about trying to fit in to the nearly all-girl world of figure skating, including the times he has had to change clothes in a toilet stall at skating events because there were no locker rooms available for boys.I used to think that the concept of gender — of "girl things" and "boy things" — was what was holding us back.Now I see it differently.The interdependent yin and yang of gender is a fundamental part of who we are, individually and collectively. We need people who like to fix cars and people who like to fix dinner. We need people who are willing and able to fight if needed and people who are exquisitely tuned into a baby's needs. But for millennia, we have forced these traits to align with biological sex, causing countless individuals to be dissatisfied and diminished. For the most part, we've recognized this with girls. But we have a long way to go when it comes to boys. As Gloria Steinem observed, "We've begun to raise daughters more like sons … but few have the courage to raise our sons more like our daughters."I acknowledge that young boys feeling pressured to be sports fans is not our country's biggest problem related to gender.Transgender individuals still confront discrimination and violence. The #MeToo movement has revealed to anyone who didn't already know it that girls and women can't go about their everyday lives without bumping into male sexual aggression.But if our culture shifts to wholeheartedly embrace the whole spectrum of unboyishness, it may play some small role in addressing these other issues, too. Male culture will be redefined, enriched, and expanded, diluting the toxic masculinity that is at the root of most of our gender-related problems.Boys and girls alike will be able to decide if they would rather be made up of snips and snails, sugar and spice, or a customized mix. And my future grandsons, unlike my sons, won't think twice about wearing pink or reading about a girl detective at school.This story originally appeared on Motherwell and is reprinted here with permission.This article originally appeared six years ago.

As soon as our cat steps onto one of the soft, fluffy blankets in our living room, her eyes go half-mast, her head hangs low, and she starts rhythmically kneading on it. Occasionally, she'll hover her nose just above the blanket while she kneads for minutes at a time, as if she's been sucked into a trance of some sort. This kneading behavior, colloquially known as "making biscuits," is known to cat owners but always funny nonetheless. Like, what a bizarre instinct for an animal to have. It's not a survival instinct, nothing to do with keeping themselves safe or alive, just "Ooooh, I'm feeling the urge to massage something with my paws right now." via GIPHYWhat makes cats want to knead like this? What's this "making biscuits" business all about for them?According to Cornerstone Veterinary Hospital in Clifton Park, New York, there are multiple reasons cats knead:Your cat feels happy and safe like they did with MomThe most obvious explanation for the kneading is that it's an extension of kitten behavior. If you've ever seen a kitten breastfeeding, you may have witnessed them kneading as they suckle to help express the milk. Those cozy, comforting moments of being nurtured and nourished by their mothers may cause cats to engage in similar behaviors as adults when they're happy and content.Your cat loves youWe all want to believe that our cats adore us as much as we adore them, and kneading is one way they show us affection. Think of it as a way of them saying, "Hey, thanks for making me feel happy, safe and content like Mom used to." Even if we don't have definitive proof that that's what it means, we'll go with it. They make biscuits out of love. via GIPHYYour cat is preparing their 'nest'Sometimes kneading may be an instinct that stems even further back than kittenhood. Our domestic feline friends' ancestors would soften the grass to prepare a comfy place to sleep. Kneading to prepare for a nice rest—all that wandering around the house gets exhausting—can be a throwback to that feral cat behavior.Your cat is oh-so-relaxedThere are different modes of kneading that cat owners may notice. Sometimes it may almost seem frantic, like they're so happy they just can't stop themselves from doing it. Other times, they're super duper chill and the kneading is more like a slow meditation. The latter mode may be their way of expressing relaxation or of stretching their muscles before drifting off to sleep.Your cat is leaving their scent to mark their territoryCats are known for marking their territory with scent, which they do in several different ways. (Rubbing their cheeks on things and kneading are the cute ways. Spraying and peeing, not so cute.) Cat paws have scent secretors in them, so kneading is a way to signal to other cats that the spot they're kneading on is theirs. That includes you. via GIPHYYour cat is in heat or laborNot a cause of kneading for spayed pets, but if a female cat is in heat she might knead as a signal that she's ready to mate. Additionally, if she's pregnant, it might be a sign she's in labor. "If your cat was in heat about two months prior, became more prominent in the belly, and they are now making biscuits in their bedding, they may be in labor," shares Cornerstone. "One of the first signs of feline labor is a mother cat preparing comfortable bedding for her soon-to-be-born babies." Makes sense. What should you do if a cat is kneading on you? “Some cats might want to be petted while they’re kneading on you; some cats might just want to be talked to; some cats might just want to knead and have no other interaction with you,” certified applied animal behaviorist Kristyn Vitale tells Scientific American. “There’s so much individual variability.” Of course there is. It's cats we're talking about here. Individual fickleness is the name of the game.via GIPHYWhat if you don't want your cat to knead on you? Too bad. There's not really anything you can do to stop it. Just make sure their claws are trimmed if it hurts or put a thick blanket between you and your little biscuit-maker. Most cat owners love this behavior, though, as it's such a curiously delightful tendency. So enjoy your kitty massage when you get one and know that unless your cat is in heat or pregnant, it's a positive sign that they feel happy in your care.

A recent thread on X by @iamluismalheiro has reignited interest in a fascinating problem. In his thread, Luis recounts the 1990 controversy sparked by Marilyn vos Savant, who famously tackled the puzzle in her “Ask Marilyn” column. Before we get to the controversy, let's play the game. Ready? There are three doors. Behind one is a car—a gleaming, shiny, make-your-friends-jealous car. The other two? Goats. What happens to the goats if you win is anyone’s guess, but let’s stay focused. Pick a door. 1, 2, or 3. Got one? Great. Let’s say you picked door 1. Now, the host opens door 3 to reveal…a goat. Now comes the big moment. The host gives you a choice: stick with your original pick, or switch to door 2? What do you do? If you switched, congrats—you just won a brand new 1965 Pontiac Tempest! If you didn’t, well…enjoy your new goat. But why? Why does switching lead to victory twice as often as staying with the original door? The puzzle that stumped millions This is the Monty Hall Problem, named after the host of the classic game show Let’s Make a Deal. It’s simple enough to explain, but the math behind it has baffled people for decades. Even PhDs and mathematicians have gotten it wrong. via GIPHY The question boils down to this: When Monty opens the door to reveal a goat, does switching increase your odds of winning the car? The answer is yes—switching doubles your chances of winning. Marilyn’s bold answer—and the backlash In 1990, Marilyn vos Savant, recognized for having one of the highest recorded IQs, confidently declared, “Yes, you should switch.” Her answer was based on solid math, but it provoked a storm of criticism. She received over 10,000 letters, including nearly 1,000 from PhDs. Many accused her of misunderstanding the problem or even being incapable of basic logic. Others resorted to personal attacks: "You are the goat!" — Anonymous critic Some critiques veered into outright sexism: "Maybe women look at math problems differently than men." — Anonymous critic But Marilyn stood her ground, unwavering in her confidence. Over time, her answer was proven right by computer simulations run by MIT, as well as by experiments conducted by MythBusters. Eventually, many academics who had criticized her publicly apologized for their errors, acknowledging her insight and logic. The ordeal transformed Marilyn into a symbol of intellectual resilience, and her calm persistence in the face of hostility continues to inspire people today. Her answer: "Yes, you should switch." She got over 10,000 letters, with nearly 1,000 from PhDs. 90% stated how wrong she was: • "You are the goat!" • "You blew it, and you blew it big!" • "Maybe women look at math problems differently than men." But was she wrong? pic.twitter.com/zowpoL92G6 — Luis Malheiro (@iamluismalheiro) November 19, 2024 Marilyn’s lasting legacy Marilyn often reflected on her experience, noting how the backlash revealed deeper issues with how we approach learning and problem-solving. She attributed much of the confusion—and the vitriol—to flaws in the education system. “Our schools teach us to memorize answers, not to question them,” she argued, advocating for an approach to education that encourages independent thinking. View this post on Instagram A post shared by All That's Interesting (@all_thats_interesting) Despite the loneliness that sometimes accompanied her intellect, Marilyn saw her gift as a blessing. “It’s not easy being this smart,” she admitted, but she never shied away from using her platform to challenge conventional thinking. Her Monty Hall response remains one of the most famous examples of sticking to the truth in the face of overwhelming opposition. Today, her story is a reminder that being right doesn’t always mean being popular—but it’s worth standing firm. As Luis Malheiro’s viral thread shows, the Monty Hall Problem continues to fascinate people, thanks in no small part to Marilyn’s courage and conviction. Here’s the math Let’s break it down. When you first choose a door, you have a 1/3 chance of picking the car and a 2/3 chance of picking a goat. If you’ve picked a goat (which happens 2/3 of the time), switching after the host reveals another goat guarantees the car. It's a numbers game backed up by MIT supercomputers and the Mythbusters alike: Pick the car (1/3 chance): Switching loses. Pick a goat (2/3 chance): Switching wins. So, by switching, you win 2/3 of the time. "Switching wins 2/3 of the time." — Luis Malheiro Why is it so hard to grasp? The Monty Hall Problem messes with our intuition. Most people reset the odds after the host reveals a goat, assuming it’s now a 50/50 choice between the remaining doors. But the math doesn’t work that way—the odds of your initial pick being correct stay at 1/3. via GIPHY In her defense of the solution, Marilyn criticized the education system for fostering passive learners who lack the tools to think critically. It’s a critique that feels just as relevant today. The thread blowing up on X Luis Malheiro’s thread has reignited the debate, drawing millions of views and sparking conversations about math, intuition, and education. Many users shared their disbelief at the backlash Marilyn endured, while others admitted they’d initially gotten the problem wrong themselves. "It’s not easy being this smart." — Marilyn vos Savant Why it matters The Monty Hall Problem isn’t just a fun game show puzzle—it’s a reminder of the importance of critical thinking and the courage to stand by the truth, even when it’s unpopular. Threads like Luis’s help bring these lessons to a new audience. So, the next time you’re faced with a tough choice, consider the Monty Hall Problem. Sometimes, the smartest move is to switch.

When you’re in your 20s, you feel indestructible. You’re hip, healthy, and look good and there’s no way you’ll fall for the pitfalls that plague people as they age, whether it’s poor health, bad financial decisions, or deteriorating personal relationships.Well, once most people reach 40, the idea that they’re indestructible has fallen by the wayside. You realize that you’re not perfect and are subject to the whims of Father Time, just like everyone else. At this point in life, you look back and think of everything you could have done to set yourself up for your second act. You start to consider whether you put enough effort into saving money, building friendships and working out.The chasm between how we see life in our 20s versus 40s is the crux of an interesting conversation on Reddt’s AskReddit subforum. A user asked people in their 40s (younger Gen Xers and older Millennials) to help Gen Z by sharing the things people in their 20s don’t realize will affect them later in life.Gen Xers are good people to for advice these days because they have recently entered a unique “sandwich generation” phase, where many are both caretakers for their elderly parents and their younger children. This gives them a better understanding of how your choices when you're younger affect you in old age. They also understand their children's fast-paced, tech-enabled world, many of whom are in their teens. Gen Zers, on the other hand, are ages 12 to 27 and in the prime of their youth. So they’re either focused on becoming self-reliant adults or enjoying life as teenagers.Here are 14 of the best answers to the question posed to people in their 40s: What do people in their 20s not realize will affect them later in life?1. Be concerned about your parents' health"What's really going to affect you is your parents' health, presuming they're still alive and you have a good relationship with them. If your parents live into old age, they will need more and more help. They won't understand how things work. They'll be more susceptible to scams. If they're like mine, they'll be stubborn and won't acknowledge their weakening faculties. Try getting someone who's driven for 60 years to surrender their license because their eyes aren't so good. And when one dies, the other will likely have fallen into a very co-dependent lifestyle, and the structure is completely destroyed. You know it's going to happen, but you don't realize how it'll manifest itself until it plays out."2. Keep moving"Don't stop moving. I started working from home in my mid-30s. I went from walking back and forth in the office from the printer to my desk 100 times a day, to not moving. I have major issues now, 14 years later. Part of those are caused by not moving! Get up and take a walk, dance, ride a bike, swim. "Keep moving people, if you don't, you eventually won't be able to move without great pain!"3. Protect your hearing"Wear ear protection at concerts, dammit!""Wear ear protection AT WORK. I’m left-handed and almost completely deaf in my left ear from working on diesel engines most of my life. I’m 37."4. Wear sunscreen"Wear some freaking sunscreen. Skin cancer sucks!""I’m 41 and just got a bunch of sun damage lasered off my face yesterday. I was a lifeguard from 2002-2006. And regularly went to tanning beds until 2010 like all good Oregon Trail millennial girls back in the day. For the love, wear your sunscreen and don’t do what I did!"5. It CAN be you, pt. 1"Everyone thinks it won't be them: You won't get in a car accident, you're a safe driver. You won't get diabetes, you've always been good about sweets. You'd never fall for propaganda, you're too smart for that. You'd never end up in a cult, only gullible people believe in stuff like that. You'll never end up on the streets or in prison, you would never commit a crime. You'll never get cancer, that's something that happens to old people, or smokers, or people exposed to radiation. You'd never fall for obvious advertising, you're too smart to be caught by tricks like word choice or urgency or edited photos. You'll never fall for a scammer, you know better than that.Become comfortable with the fact that things WILL happen to you. That you'll get sick or injured or develop a chronic illness. You'll get taken in by what, in hindsight, will be an obvious scam. That you'll believe someone's lies or end up impoverished or desperate, or if YOU were in such-and-such situations, you very probably would make the same mistakes that anyone in that situation would. Being aware that you aren't likely to be the exception to the rule is a kindness to yourself and others."6. It CAN be you p. 2"On the flipside of this argument...it CAN be you, so write that novel, make that indie movie, play in that band...do whatever it is that you're passionate about. Don't let your soul-crushing job rob you of the joy of your passions."7. Understand compounding interest"The power of compounding interest. For the love of god, start socking some money into your retirement as early as possible. Look at the charts online of the difference between starting to save a little when you’re younger versus how much you have to put away when you’re older to actually retire one day."A great way to learn how the money you save today can be extremely valuable when you reach retirement age is to play around with this compound interest calculator. It may not seem like much, but 6% annual interest, compounded over a few decades, can turn into a lot of money. 8. Physical jobs are hard on your body"That physical job is not paying you for the damage it does to your body. I did flooring for 18 years before I got out of it. I was a subcontractor and made great money. Until I realized that it wasn't enough to fix my joints. I have shoulder problems from carrying rolls of carpet and pad up endless flights of stairs. I was lucky and somehow my knees are ok."9. Stretch younglings, stretch"I’m a 27F who has been working from home since 2020. I never exercised or stretched until about a month ago, when I fully committed to a home workout routine. When I first tried to reach for my feet, I could barely bend far enough for my fingertips to touch my knees—it was painful! Thanks to daily stretches, I can almost reach my toes without discomfort. Progress! I’m getting there."10. Beward of cynicism"Cynicism. You'll disguise it as 'realism.' But you gotta get past that sh*t to wisdom. And even then, if you're lucky, you get a tiny kernel of wisdom. But it's better than sauntering through life feeling hard done by. I've moved on from friends who thought this way, people who don't lift you up and are only too happy to help you down."11. People rarely change"Avoid sticking with a person you are never going to change. Worst mistake ever."12. Get rid of the negative energy in your life"That includes bad habits and bad people... even if they're family. I've seen some people keep losers (male & female) around for far too long, and they got bogged down with their problems. then, when they needed help, the losers pulled them down even more.the people you choose to have in your life can greatly affect the course of your life... make sure they're adding and not subtracting."13. The bricks can bring you down"People in their 20s don’t realize that every year they live isn’t just another trip around the sun; it’s another brick added to the backpack you’re carrying through life. When you’re young, that bag’s practically empty—light as hell. You’ve got a few memories, a couple of heartbreaks, maybe a regret or two, but nothing that really weighs you down. You’re sprinting through life thinking it’ll always feel this fresh and easy.But by the time you hit your 40s, that backpack’s packed to the brim. Every relationship you’ve had, every choice you made—or didn’t make—starts to add up. It’s not just the passage of time; it’s the weight of that time. You’ve got the good stuff—family, love, achievements—but you’ve also got the “what-ifs,” the missed opportunities, and the regrets. Those regrets? Man, they’re like invisible bricks—things you didn’t even know would haunt you later. Not calling someone when you should’ve, passing on that one big risk, staying in a bad situation too long... all that stacks up."14. Put effort into relationships"I remember my best friend's father saying that in your 20s a social life is easy and natural. Keep strong connections with people who matter in your life. Divorce, lost a job, bankruptcy and illness—one or another are very usual in your 40's—can suddenly show how alone someone really is and hit hard. One is the most dangerous number."

When my oldest daughter was little, Cocomelon wasn't the sensation it is today. It didn't take over on YouTube until around 2018 and it didn't show up on Netflix until 2020. We discovered it around the time my youngest was born, and it was a lifesaver! What an amazing tool to have in our arsenal when we needed a break from chasing her around or needed her to sit still and eat for a few minutes.She absolutely devoured it, and I never had an issue with JJ and the gang being on in the background. The show had cute songs, bright colors, and seemed to have some light teaching elements that I liked (letters, manners, eating fruits and vegetables, that kind of thing). Little did I know that Cocomelon was actually the most destructive show on television. At least, according to some parents and experts.More and more has come out in recent years about Cocomelon's methods and how they're able to make their content so sticky.The show is meticulously engineered to hold the attention of babies and toddlers. Everything is intentional, from the bright colors to the frequent cuts and scene changes.In fact, during testing, Moonbug Entertainment (the producers behind the show) use something called a "Distractatron" to measure exactly when they're losing kids' attention. Basically, the Distractatron is a screen with mundane real-world footage rolling on it next to the episode they're testing. When kids look away from the show to watch whatever boring thing is being shown on the Distractatron, producers know they can tweak those moments in the episodes to make them more engaging.Or addicting, depending on how you look at it. — (@) There's a growing chorus of parents online that think this kind of testing and optimization is not just icky, but truly harmful.Some even accuse Cocomelon of causing or contributing to serious lifelong issues like delayed speech, ADHD, and even Autism.People claim it turns kids into zombies and that they show symptoms of withdrawal when you make them turn it off. — (@) The experts have weighed in, too: Cocomelon isn't necessarily great for kids, but it might be getting a bad rap."Cocomelon is very stimulating thus it really draws in the attention of children and it is also faster paced than some other shows for children which can make it more addictive," says Dr. Maya Weir of Thriving California.The bright colors and quit camera cuts definitely contribute to the dopamine reward response in children, which makes watching it feel extra exciting. It can also make them really not want to turn the show off.But... it's probably misguided to single out Cocomelon in particular. "All screens and tv shows are attention grabbing and addictive for children. Any show will activate dopamine which will create the child to desire the show again and again. I don't think it is appropriate for parents to attribute speech delay, autism and ADHD to watching Cocomelon," says Weir.Let's say that again for the folks in the back. Watching TV, even hyper-optimized shows like Cocomelon, will not give your kids ADHD or autism.It is worth having a look at how much overall screentime your kids are getting, however, whether it's with Cocomelon, another show, or a mix of different content."Highly stimulating shows like Cocomelon can make quieter activities feel as exciting as watching paint dry," says Veronica West, psychologist at My Thriving Mind. "That doesn’t mean it causes ADHD or speech delays, but too much screen time can crowd out important interactions like chatting, playing, and, you know, digging through the trash when you’re not looking. So, let’s blame screen overuse, not just JJ and his catchy tunes."Screentime guidelines from the American Academy of Pediatrics are a good starting point. For kids 2-5, they recommend keep it to an hour or less per day.Parents panicking over TV shows is nothing new. And it's totally understandable.Anyone remember when Barney was thought to be subliminally sending satanic messages to kids through songs and leading to a generation of morally-bankrupt children?Remember when Caillou was going to, for lack of a better term, turn kids evil through his modeling of horrible behavior?Peppa Pig was even accused of quite literally causing autism in kids. The study the rumor was based on turned out to be a complete hoax, but those rumors have stuck around and turned a lot parents away from the show.It's a good idea to try not to get caught up in the panic whenever a new show starts getting criticism.In the last year or so, we've drastically reduced the amount of Cocomelon we use in our house. Down to almost zero. Part of that is that my youngest daughter is getting older. But I admit that I don't necessarily love the way it's engineered to be addicting, and that's been part of the decision.But again, it's not just Cocomelon. Our beloved Disney and Pixar do similar testing on their movies — they want to make sure they're triggering the right emotions at the right times and, of course, not losing your attention along the way. That's just the world we live in now, and it continues through adulthood with Instagram, TikTok, and pretty much everything else we interact with.I get the instinct to protect your kids from as much of this stuff as possible for as long as you can. @thecircusbrain #cocomelon #cocomelonchallenge vs #sesamestreet ? You're not going to mess your kids up by letting them watch Cocomelon! But here are a few things you might keep in mind if you choose to.First, remember to set screentime limits. Just as important as what you choose to watch, is how much of it you allow.Next, if possible, watch Cocomelon with your kids! The APA actually recommends zero solo media usage for kids under two. If you can, sit and watch with them and ask them questions about what they're seeing on the screen.Similarly, sing the songs and do the dances with them after you've turned the show off. This will help reinforce critical social and speech skills.And finally, remember that it's your choice. You don't have to allow Cocomelon in your house if you want. But we do need to be careful about casually implying that anything causes ADHD, autism, or speech delays when the evidence just isn't there.And if you find JJ and his pals annoying and just don't want to listen to it anymore? Well, you're definitely not alone!

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