There's a silver lining.

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Chris and Bre Giglio run a popular parenting TikTok with nearly 200,000 followers. Some of their most popular posts have been about what Chris calls his "mornings with the girls." "Nearly every morning for over 3 years I've gotten up with our girls so Bre can get the sleep deserves after she gave so much to grow our little family," he captioned one such video. It shows him up at the crack of dawn cleaning up the kitchen, folding laundry, and making his daughters breakfast.But Chris noticed a peculiar response he'd often get when he posted about his morning routine. While people were mostly excited to see a dad taking good care of the girls in his life, others took the opportunity to ask prying questions about Bre. "Does she ever let you sleep in? Just wondering if you ever have 'you' days?" one user asked relatively politely. Others commenters aren't so kind, asking essentially, if Bre doesn't get up with the kids, what does she even do?Chris took a moment to respond to the questions in a recent video, and the response perfectly encapsulates what a partnership should look like."I've gotten up with my daughters every morning since they were born because that's what has worked best for us. But for some reason if I share about that for long enough, someone's going to ask a variation of the question, but what does she do for you?" he says."... that question also gets me feeling like we can sometimes forget what marriage is all about."He goes on to talk about how he's a morning person who loves getting up on the early side. Since he sometimes has to work late, he looks forward to having that guaranteed time with the kids. His wife, on the other hand, is a night owl and does her best work in the evening — so it just wouldn't make sense for them to flip-flop just because of "fairness.""I do these things because I love her and I wanna make her life better, not because I'm looking to stack up a tower of I-owe-you chips."Watch the rest of Chris' excellent response in the TikTok here: @chrisandbre.g Replying to @Magen Bostwick there’s no scorecard in marriage, which is also why @Bre Giglio and I can both be winners #marriage #married #marriagetok #marriedtiktok #marriagegoals In the caption of the post, Chris wrote: "There's no scorecard in marriage, which is why Bre and I can both be winners."Chris and Bre have figured out an incredibly important concept when it comes to making a marriage last: Equality and equity are not the same thing.Equality refers to when people are treated exactly the same regardless of needs, preferences, resources, etc. Equity is a concept that means everyone gets what they need to reach an equal outcome.Trying to enact perfect equality in a marriage as parents can create a mess. Making sure each partner has an equal number of early wakeups every week, takes turns folding the laundry, contributes identically to the cooking and dishes and meal plan. It's impossible to get right, unsustainable, and inevitably leads to arguments when the score isn't perfectly settled.Equity looks like Chris' videos. He takes the early shift with the kids because he doesn't mind doing it and is better suited to the mornings. That's his thing, and it frees his wife up to contribute to the household in a way that suits her own strengths. As long as both partners are pulling their weight, that's how it ought to be done.The response to Chris' morning videos also raise another issue: Few people would ever accuse a dad of being lazy if his wife was excited to let him sleep in while she cooked breakfast. The double standard is outrageous and it doesn't do anyone any favors. It should be super normal to see a dad picking up a big chunk of the load at home, not a rarity.Fortunately, most of Chris and Bre's followers are totally on board with their approach:"marriage isn’t about keeping score. when both ppl give 100% to each other, no one feels like they’re slipping through the cracks ❤️it’s honestly the best," one commenter wrote."True love is splitting the chores fairly but not 50/50. My wife does most of the laundry, i hate it and she doesn't mind meanwhile I cook most of the time because she hates it and I like it. It works because it works for you both," said another."100% and if it was the other way around no one would ask what she does for you ?" added another.We love seeing a dad go out of his way to spend extra time with his kids rather than treat is as an obligation. As a night owl myself, it makes me want to crank that alarm back a few hours and pop out of bed to whip up pancakes before my kids are up — well, almost.

We know that even a 10 minute power nap can do wonders for our energy levels. And yet, for many of us, the thought of being able to get proper rest within a mere ten minutes might seem like a far off distance dream. However, maybe it’s because we don’t realize that a 10 minute power nap requires a slightly different strategy than our nighttime sleep. As Dr. Joe Whittington, aka Dr. Joe MD on TikTok, explained, there’s a “Navy SEAL-inspired power napping technique that many of our elite forces swear by,” that can have folks actually feeling refreshed in a fraction of the time. But here’s the thing— you have to position yourself a certain way. In the clip, Dr. Joe suggests finding the edge of a bed or couch, and lying down so that your legs are propped up on the elevated surface at a ninety-degree angle. In the demonstration he also has his hands folded on his abdomen. “Laying in this position for 10 minutes is going to accomplish two things,” he says. “First, it’s going to reduce swelling in your legs as well as return blood flow to your core. Both of these are going to trigger relaxation."“Second," he continues, "by limiting the time to 10 minutes, you will wake up during the light phase of sleep and therefore wake up feeling refreshed.” @drjoe_md Here's a Navy SEAL-inspired hack for a quick energy boost: take a 10-minute power nap with your legs elevated. This position promotes blood flow back to your core, reducing swelling in your legs and triggering relaxation. Studies show that short naps improve alertness and mood without the grogginess of deeper sleep. This trick is ideal for a fast reset when you're low on time, helping you feel refreshed and ready to tackle the rest of your day. #lowenergy #naptime #sleeptips #healthtips #doctoradvice @Braden Wellman ♬ original sound - Dr. Joe, M.D. ? As pointed out by the New York Post, this technique was first introduced to the mainstream by Retired Navy SEAL Jocko Willink, who boasted to Business Insider that his personal power naps are capped at 8 minutes. Of course he apparently can resist free pizza and donuts, so the man is clearly superhuman. boy in gray hoodie lying on black leather couch Photo by Alexander Grey on Unsplash You’ll also find this hack touted in a world nearly polar opposite of the military—theatre. In the Alexander Technique, which is form of body awareness training that focuses on improving posture and reducing tension, performers and students will engage in constructive rest, (sometimes known as “active rest”, “semi-supine” or the “Alexander lying-down position”) by lying on the floor with their knees elevated. Of course, Frederick Matthias Alexander likely got this pose from the ancient practice of yoga. Regardless of where this trick came from, it’s easy to see how folks from all walks of life can easily incorporate it into their routine when they need an energy boost. Which, let’s face it, is pretty much all of us. In a Gallup poll released in April, 57% of Americans said they would feel better if they could get more sleep. Luckily Dr. Joe has all kinds of helpful content in the realm of health education, including even more sleep tips. Previously the doc explained why those pesky mid-sleep involuntary jerks happen (and how to prevent them), as well as the benefits of cognitive shuffling when you can’t seem to quiet your mind at night. Maybe this knowledge is the key to finally getting those elusive eight hours. But if a power nap is all you have time for, then channel your inner Navy SEAL. a sea lion resting on a wooden dock Photo by Michael Obeysekera on Unsplash

Society often portrays men as logical creatures who are good problem solvers because they don't have all these emotions that get in the way. It's something that's often wielded as this superpower that men have over their female counterparts. This isn't anything of men's doing, at least not men from the last several generations. This "logical non-emotional" stereotype was thrust upon them in much the same way as the stereotype that women are "too emotional" and borderline hysterical when things don't go their way. There's no getting around bumping into this general thought process or at least the remnants of it on a near daily basis. Because it's so prevalent in societal norms in much of the western world, men and women subconsciously internalize these things. But anyone who has raised both genders are aware that boys and girls are equally as emotional, it's just that they start receiving very different messages about that emotionality from a very early age. Starting around preschool age boys begin to hear, "big boys don't cry" while they watch their younger sister or classmate receive comforting and kind words when they begin to cry. When it comes to young girls, they're often given more responsibilities at an earlier age whether it's teachers picking girls more often for "classroom helper" or parents focusing more on their daughter cleaning up after themselves than their sons because "boys are messy." Toughen Up Pop Tv GIF by Big Brother After Dark Giphy Many examples of this exist so before too long it would seem that both genders are getting gendered messaging about themselves and each other. But in recent years there has been a shift in people wanting men to get in touch with their emotions as to not feed into the societal American norm of toxic masculinity. This focus on men's emotional well-being comes on the heels of research showing the harmful effects of enforcing restrictive gender roles. According to United Way, "restrictive gender norms often limit children’s potential and opportunities, affect their self-esteem and mental health, and shape their relationships with peers."As society shifts to be more flexible with gender norms, men are beginning to not only admit to having feelings other than anger or happiness, but are expressing them. Or at least, they're attempting to express them according to the overwhelming repetitive response to a question posed on Reddit. A user asks, "men, why do you say you're fine when you're not" and the answers were heartbreaking. Im Fine Episode 2 GIF by Friends Giphy One person responds with, "Because I think most believe that nobody truly gives a f*ck," which was quickly backed up by others with personal stories. Another shares, "Honestly, no one really listens. You get about five words in and people decide where they think you’re going with this. Then they talk about that thing instead of what you’re talking about no matter what you say. Its usually easier for me to work through and process things myself than put the effort into fighting to be understood.""My wife and I are having this problem right now. She finally blew up at me and said I don't talk to her anymore and I told her it's because she doesn't listen. I'll explain my thoughts or intentions in deep detail, but after the first 10 words or so she thinks she totally understands and tunes out everything else. Which ends up being cyclical, because she'll get mad that I didn't tell her something when in fact I did. Just easier to not say anything at all at this point, or keep answers to one subject and 10 words or less," someone chimes in adding to the sentiment of not being heard. Season 3 Hug GIF by Black Sails Giphy One man explains the rules he has learned, "My entire life as a man, I've been taught two things. I need to be coming up with solutions to problems. And if I'm not useful, I'm useless. The moment I ask for help or show that I need help with a problem rather than being the one helping with a problem, I am then regarded as the problem. When I am the problem, I'm not useful; see above."Another reveals expressing emotions results in him comforting others, "Because if I tell you I'm not fine, it inexplicably somehow turns into me trying to comfort and reassure you. No, it's not because of you. No I'm not mad that you thought this was all about you. Well you shouldn't feel guilty. I'm sorry you're upset now. Of course I still love you. I'm sorry for upsetting you, honey. No, I promise I'm fine. Everything is perfect."Men are listening to women and others telling them to open up about their emotions but their seems to be an important component missing. There are therapists that specialize in helping men achieve emotional intelligence and communication of their emotional needs. But it will take further shifting in societal consciousness to recognize when men are being vulnerable with their needs. This isn't just a men problem, it's a social conditioning problem that needs to be dismantled as one person points out by saying, "ironically sometimes women still subconsciously carry the sexist belief that men should have better control over their emotions." Unlearning something that is ingrained in all aspects of society takes time as does learning to tap into and express feelings that were once equated to weakness. Everyone is learning and giving grace and understanding can go a long way to figuring things out.

Giving birth is one of the sweetest and most transformational life events. But for mothers who deliver angel babies (those who do not make it through delivery or pass shortly after birth), it becomes utterly devastating. To comfort mothers during this heart aching time, a labor and delivery nurse decided to create a comforting gift for grieving mothers to bring home."POV: your patient just gained an angel baby ? and you make sure she doesn't go home empty handed," she writes in the video as she cuts baby blankets into the shape of a heart. "So you get to work. Measure out rice the exact birth weight of her angel. And start to make a casing out of her baby blanket." @thelabornursern #grief #loss #fetalloss #pregnancy #labordeliverynurses #laboranddelivery #griefandloss #laboranddeliverynurse #nursing #nursesoftiktok #nursetok #nurselife The camera pans to three bags of dry rice placed on the baby blanket. From there, she begins to sew the blanket that is filled with rice. "Sutures to sew the fabric," she adds, with footage of herself hand-stitching every seam of the blanket. "It's almost ready ? Then we fill the casing with rice, measured to her baby's birth weight so she will always have this to hold onto."The video ends with a final look at the filled and finished pillow. "Time to give it to her ❤️?" she adds.And the heartfelt gesture received such a positive response from her followers and mothers of angel babies. "as a momma of an angel baby, you are doing so much more than you can ever think by doing this! bless you ❤️," one wrote. Another added, "As a mama who left the hospital without my baby, thank you THANK YOU. I felt so alone leaving the hospital, held my belly the entire ride home then walked into a home full of baby stuff and no baby." And another angel baby mom shared, "As a stillbirth mama, leaving the hospital without my baby was torture. Having something weighted to hold would have brought comfort. You're so sweet for making this!!! ??" The aching experience was described by another angel mom in the comments. "My son was stillborn earlier this year. One thing I could have never anticipated was how much my arms literally ached to hold him. Our bodies do not understand our baby died, and we instinctually need something to hold. This is such a beautiful gift," she commented.The TikTok community expressed interest in donating sewing machines to help her, so she shared an informative video with her followers on how they can donate to their local hospitals' labor and delivery units. https://www.tiktok.com/@thelabornursern/photo/7435010215562480938 [THIS IS COMING UP AS AN ERROR WHEN I TRY TO INSERT?]In another video update, she shared with her followers that she purchased a portable sewing machine to streamline the sewing process of the blankets. "I ordered a portable sewing machine to keep in my locker! And a few of my coworkers want to get together once a month and premake these for our unit." TikTok · thelabornursern TikTok · thelabornursern www.tiktok.com 9732 likes, 57 comments. “Replying to @Rachel Wagner” She added, "So many of you wanted to jump in and donate, and that is faith in humanity restored. Thank you to each and every one from the bottom of my heart." @thelabornursern Replying to @Mykal it was my first time using this, and you were right Mykal it is a little difficult to use. it threw me for a loop so ill be practicing until I can do it blind folded "Here's an update on the portable sewing machine that I got. It actually is really hard to use...it will definitely take some practice, but I'll get it," she says in the voiceover. The kind gesture by this labor and delivery nurse made a deep impact, spurring angel baby moms to share their stories and the real impact her empathy has created.